Train Guard Goes Off The Rails?

Well here we go again in the bizarre workings of our lives and yet again realise that the various cogs and gears need oiling. Today we bore witness to which words fail me- I will, however, try my best to phase what I can only call 'The Rage of the Train Guard!'

It all began as we standing at Worthing Station waiting for our daily train to take us back to Shoreham and, as ever, it was delayed. This is not strange but then it got weirder. An announcement then rang out over the station which explained the delays 'I'm sorry for the delay to your journeys but some idiot, or idiots, have place some yellow pages on the station at Goring. This is very stupid and is stopping all of the trains.' Despite the obvious seriousness of the situation I could hardly prevent myself and I burst into laugher. What an absurd thing to happen? The next thing that occurred to my usually perplexed brain was that it couldn't possibly take long to clear- surely just move the offending yellow pages and bingo! Trains run again!

My rather naive diagnosis, however, proved to be a falsehood as it took a further 15 minutes to clear to line. During this time however the 30-odd St Andrews students began to get a little, well, restless. This lead to another bizarre call from 'the angry train guard' now yelling irately saying 'Will the insane kids please stop messing around!' which provoke only further laugher. At this he yelled down the microphone 'WILL YOU STOP PLAYING WITH THAT LIFT OR I WILL COME UP THERE MYSELF!' - this only provoked only a chorus of 'ooooo's' as is customary amongst our students. How amusing! I think somebody needs to give the crazy man counselling!

As I close there's one more thing I’d much like to know- who placed the offending material (the yellow pages) on the line- was it you? Do you know them? Was it funny? It was any of these please give us a bell!

posted by Matt and Mark @ 5:51 PM Comments: 1